The Conceptual “Perfect Date”: How to give her an Unforgettable Experience

When we go out with a woman we are really crushing on, we wonder where should I take her? What should we do? How can I make her crush on me just as hard? We just seem to think we can create this perfect night and everything is going to be good. Well the harsh reality is we can’t create the perfect date, but we can create a great experience that will encourage her into believing you took her on the best date she has ever been on or into believing this was “a perfect date.”

Recon Work: Listen Up

To create the perfect date you need to pay attention and do your recon work, you don’t take some girls to “The Avengers” and you do others. Some women love Chinese food, some love French food but if you don’t pay attention to what she is saying you’ll never know. If you’ve been paying attention while she’s been talking you will find out more than you realize. Just listen up and you will found out her interests, what she likes to eat, it’s not hard to just ask, you can even joke with her “I’ll let you take me to dinner at bla bla.” A lot of times a woman will come up with some sort of joking rebuttal, “If I pay we are going here.” All you need to do is take note.

After you are finished with your recon work all you have to do is formulate a way to involve a food she may like and an experience you already know she enjoys. It’s a simple process and you can certainly use all of it to your advantage with just being more aware than the next guy.


Your environment can certainly influence how good a time a woman has. You don’t take a vegan or vegetarian to a meat heavy restaurant with no available vegan/vegetarian dishes. You don’t want to take a woman to a bar where there are going to be other men trying to come up and snag her away. You want to take her to a place where it can just be the two of you and you can use this to build a connection.

Dilated Pupils

The lighting in an environment can help manufacture arousal. So if the lighting is dim, your pupils dilate. This is the root of candle light dinner, dim lighting helps dilate the pupils and even better when they are placed in between can make your eyes shine even more for that bedroom eyes effect.

If you want to help create a great date environment for a woman take her to dinner at a relatively dim lit area with good food.

Seating Arrangements

This is something I’ve read only once (and haven’t seen in anywhere else) but I do believe it works(perhaps it’s all in my mind). Basically all you do is place your chair slightly to the left of hers so that your right eyes align and simple look into her right eye. This for some reason seems to magnify a connection; you just introduce it by saying something along the lines of “Nobody beats me at the eye contact game.” The game where you make eye contact and see who blinks/looks away first is the eye contact game. This can help create sexual tension and a connection.

If you sit next to each other make sure to sit on the left side so that you can appeal to her “emotional ear”, it is theorized(not fact guys) that when you speak to her left side with more emotional words and tone. So you can sit on her left side so you can keep the date more emotional, always better when it comes to getting a woman to associate emotion with you. We make our decisions based on emotion not rationality. This tactic hasn’t hurt my chances with any women.


When it comes to the perfect date it’s important to remember what I’ve written about arousal already a woman aroused before sex (NOT sexual arousal) will be easier to sexually arouse later. So when it comes to taking a woman on the perfect date you need an experience that will arouse her. This can be any number of things. If you are going on a day date with a woman you can take her climbing, hiking, running, anything outdoors that can keep you alone around fresh air.

If you are taking her on a dinner date you might take her to a movie after but keep in mind the type of movie you take her to also should be taken into consideration.

A suspense or horror tends to get the heart beat going a little more than a drama, laughter can arouse a positive emotion as well, but by far the most effective date movies out there are horrors because fear is a very extreme form of arousal and tends to get her looking for safety(running to you) more often. Obviously you can’t take certain women to certain types of movies, but if you can work in a horror with the woman it will increase your chances.

Dancing is one of my favorite things to do and it is a great thing to do because it’s arousing, fun, interactive, and can get very intimate. Most women love dancing and love a man that knows how to dance just as much. So taking a woman dancing (obviously take her interests and music into consideration) you can arouse her, build sexual tension (allows for more interaction and touch), and give her a fun positive experience.

These are just some examples, it’s up to you to design a date that will be fun and arouse her, this could be laser tag, paintball, or whatever else.

Always Remember to Make it An EXPERIENCE

At the end of the date she should feel not like she went on a date, but like she had a great experience. Television has built up the perfect date to be this amazing most perfect experience that ends in a spontaneous romantic kiss, everything may not happen as you want it to, but at the end (or before) you can still have that spontaneous romantic kiss.

Keep this in mind, because the kissing moment doesn’t have to come at the end of the date to cap it all off, merely build the tension with silence, smile and go in for the kiss. With attraction present it is usually easy.

You can still have a sequence of fun events, and while being the guy grabbing a dozen roses and taking her chocolates may be a little over kill(or not depending on the situation) you can still take her out to a tasty dinner with the right lighting, and take her to have a fun experience afterward. This can be anything from bowling, pool, darts, pinball, to dancing, hiking, climbing, ice skating, as long as it can be fun and an experience for her. Some of that is up to you being a fun attractive and at the same time very sexual mate so she will be attractive.

The date should stimulate every sense, if you were to follow one of Casa Nova’s techniques you would realize a woman has 5 senses and for the perfect date it’s best to have her experience the date through all 5 of her experiences.

Dinner should be tasty.

You should smell good and where you go should smell good. (Don’t take her to the smelly place)

You should take her to somewhere pleasant to look at (and be well groomed) so that she has a positive visual experience.

Make sure what you do stimulates her positively, and makes her feel good, this goes from touch to conversation to humor.

The sound should be right up her alley, don’t take a metal head to a Latin club and vice versa.

Chocolate and Roses

My thoughts on chocolate and roses are really person to person. If you are a romancer and know you won’t look like needy I suggest getting them chocolate and roses, this means when you get them for her it shouldn’t be a big deal. It shouldn’t be like “Well I bought you roses and chocolates” when you took her on her first date with you, more of a not such a big deal I’ve done this before. If you feel needy doing it avoid it.

There is something to be said about the single rose, it’s romantic and not over kill. Most women will love a single rose for a date, but again you need to do your recon work, don’t get a woman allergic to roses some roses, you don’t want her having a miserable time with you. Note: Roses can add in one of those senses I just talked about, Smell.

Chocolates are good and everyone loves chocolate (for the most part). You can jump start her taste buds, and add part of an experience with some simple chocolates. Chocolate is also known for containing a chemical that is manufactured when you fall in love. So you can help her feel in love by simply buying her chocolates. Note: Don’t buy her a snickers bar and call it good, get her a box of chocolates and not necessarily a huge box just a little pack will do the trick. If at worse she eats them later and thinks of you while eating them, hardly bad for them to be thinking of you when they have the feeling brought on by chocolate.

Finishing Up on “The Perfect Date”

Make sure you remember that a great date isn’t a date so much as a great, spontaneous, arousing, experience, if you get her to enjoy the night from every sense then you will create a great experience that she will associate with you and thus have a strong attraction, arousal, and if you have followed a great escalation guideline sexual tension for you. So don’t over plan a night but certainly have some thoughts on what the night should entail, with the long term scope being a good time ( reasonably no plan set in stone otherwise the night loses that spontaneous feel).

Disclaimer: Make sure you realize if you romance a woman like this you aren’t going half way, if you just want to kick it with a girl that is a whole other story.


  1. I generally don’t advocate traditional dates(dinner,movie),but push comes to shove,this definitely sets the vibe a guy should want(playful,sexual,fun,light,flirty).

    Too many traditional-AFC dates are serious,heart-warming,etc.

    • Yeah, I’m not big on dates but if you are going to plan one out this is the route to go. Mine are more spontaneous because I understand it but I certainly get it done. Dates just need to be fun, I can be fun. In fact I would use this more for a girl where things were getting serious rather than a first date but you know it works.

      • Cool.But when I said “serious”,I was more talking about the tone of the dat opposed to being serious with the girl.

        Too many guys are too awkward and anxiety-filled to let lose and be fun on dates.

      • Oh yeah I realized that what I was trying to say is you have to be careful how you use a date of this caliber, it can create an attachment you may not know you want early on. Sorry for the confusion.

        Completely agree with you. How can the date be fun for her if you aren’t having fun?

  2. The reason,and the PUA community on a whole don’t advocate traditional dates is that the woman also get anxious and nervous.

    So a date where you’re taking the girl for a stroll to the pier or something,it eliminates awkward moments since there are plenty visuals for her to focus on.