How to Connect with that Sexy Dame: The Science behind Connecting- Part 3: Breathing and Touching

Breathing pattern

This again is a very well-known tactic to a lot of people but still not incredibly popular. When someone breaths they have a certain rhythm as we fall into sync with someone their rhythm and ours begins to match and we fall into unison. One powerful subconscious way to build a connection is to simply match their breathing pattern.

This means matching not just the speed and depth of breath but also to where they breathe. There is a difference between where you breathe as a person, some people breath to their stomach which puts you in a feel state (NLP), some people breathe to their chest, we all have certain styles of breathing. So when you match breathing patterns you want to breathe to the same place as well as at the same pace when you match breathing patterns.

Touch

Touch is a very intimate behavior. We tend to avoid touching people we like and love touching people we are attracted to but more importantly nothing replaces touch when it comes to intimacy. If you are having a long conversation with someone over the phone or on video chat, it’s not nearly the same as in person. In order for you to build a connection with anyone you need touch. Your mother was the first person to touch you, and because of this regardless of whether you like her or not holds a strong connection with you.

Politicians are known for shaking with one hand and adding a light touch to the upper arm, this creates more touch and a far more intimate interaction.

Light Upper Arm Touch

There were 2 experiments done where they tested how the influence of a brief (1-3 seconds) light upper arm would change the initial attraction and see whether it helped or hurt

In one experiment 3 different men (240 approaches) walked up to ask a woman for her number as she was walking by and see his success rate (10%). The second go around he asked the exact same question but added in additional light upper arm touch, this doubled the amount of phone number they received (20%). The women were then all told about the experiment to find out how many numbers were correct.

In another experiment an average looking man (120 approaches) went to a night club where you ask women to dance. The women again were all asked the same question in regards to dancing to a slow song, however half the time a light upper arm touch was added. There was a significant increase again in how often they said yes (43% to 65%).

This shows how significant touch can be for adding both attraction and building a connection, I highly recommend you adding this tool to your social tools cabinet.

How to Connect with that Sexy Dame: The Science behind Connecting- Part 1: Experiences and Eye Contact

How to Connect with that Sexy Dame: The Science behind Connecting- Part 2: Mirroring

How to Connect with that Sexy Dame: The Science behind Connecting- Part 3: Breathing and Touching

How to Connect with that Sexy Dame: The Science behind Connecting- Part 4: How to Talk, What to Say, and Concluding